I took my son to visit a college this past Saturday, and we had a good visit.  We were shown around the campus by students who are known as campus ambassadors, and during one stop toward the end of the visit we were asked if we had any questions.  I asked this student, “What one piece of advice she would share with these high school seniors, coming from someone who has been in their shoes and now is attending college.”

The advice was (in essence) “Begin to develop some disciplines in your life in regards to a schedule, study time, etc. because you will not have your parents around to remind (or nag) you to study or prepare.  It will be all up to you and if you do not do this (develop some disciplines) you will struggle once you get here because there will be so many other things and people vying for your attention.”

Why do so many people fight themselves when it comes to establishing disciplines in their life, be it financial, spiritual, physical… ?  When I ask my own children (ages 17, 20, & 27) this question they tell me that they are “spontaneous”, and fly by the seat of their pants, are more free and less structured than I am.

Of course, they remind me that they have done OK thus far without being particularly disciplined in their life.  DUH, you know why?  Because you have had a parent pushing, cajoling, encouraging, threatening, even nagging to make you do the things necessary to succeed thus far in your life.  The problem is when you leave your parents authority and are dependent on yourself… then you either make yourself (self-discipline) do the things necessary to succeed at a given task, class, or job OR become a slave of your desires and become an EPIC FAILURE.

Let me define epic failure; it is when you do not live up to your potential because you never learned to control your desires for your own good.  This is a form of self-sabotage because we all seek to be comfortable, so whenever we become uncomfortable (and ALL growth requires moving and existing outside our comfort zone) we will do what is necessary to get back to something that is comfortable.

Those who understand that COMFORT is not the ultimate goal, GROWTH is the ultimate goal accept the fact that we must embrace discomfort on a temporary basis until what was once uncomfortable becomes comfortable.

Illustration, tomorrow Brian, Rita, and I will run intervals at the gym.  The treadmill will be cranked up to a speed that is way beyond comfortable (6 minute mile pace), we will alternate between that pace and a 7 minute mile pace (1 minute on and one minute off).  We have been doing this for the past 5 weeks or so and although we still do not enjoy it, it is not as uncomfortable as it was when we started (it was miserable).  What has lessened the discomfort?  GROWTH.  Our aerobic capacity has grown over these weeks.

The same is true in every area of your life, growth requires pushing yourself or giving someone permission to push you to be all you can be (outside your comfortable zone into the “I don’t like this zone”).  The question is do you want comfort more than you want growth?

I have never met anyone who regrets having grown, but have met many who said they wished they had got up and done what needed to be done to succeed, however you describe success in your life.

For your life to get better… circumstances don’t need to change, others don’t need to change, YOU need to change.

“We are what we repeatedly do,
excellence then is not an act, but a habit.” — Aristotle

Dave